Thursday, June 5, 2008

Alabama---Here CJ Comes!!!!

Is this the look of an excited kid or what!!!

CJ just left to go on his 2 week vacation with another family, The Rock's. Excited doesn't even begin to describe how CJ feels. He has been counting down for the last 3 weeks. This is going to be a great adventure and something I am sure he will remember forever.

As for me, I sit here with tears in my's bittersweet. I know that he is going to have a blast and I am truly excited for him. BUT I am going to miss him. He is a part of my everyday life (ice cream every night at 9, after all the other kids have gone to bed) and you know what....I enjoy having him around. Last night we went shopping, just the two of us. We had a great time. He looked at me and asked if I was going to miss him (is he kidding!). I told him tons. He said he was going to miss me too. Throughout the day he kept telling me I can't cry. Of course I did...atleast 4 different times. I would try not to let him see me though because it gets him upset.

To tell you the truth, I don't know if it is the fact that I am going to miss him or the fear of something happening out of my control that made me cry. I will admit, I can be an anxious person by nature. I grew up with a Mom that always went to the extreme paranoid case with everything. Example--when Zachary was a toddler I remember she seriously wanted to get him a helmet to wear while playing because--like toddlers do---he fell alot while playing and would hit his head on toys, tables, his brothers head and she was afraid he was going to end up with brain damage. I have tried very hard not to do things like that to my children. I keep my anxiety and worries inside. It didn't really hit me until Tuesday that CJ was leaving so soon. That is when the thoughts started trying to creep their way in. With each though I would pray. I remember hearing "you can't be anxious and trust God at the same time". Also, I know that God is with him and already there. Nothing is going to happen to him that God didn't already know.

I will have to tell you about all the wonderful places they went when he gets back. You know, I can't believe he actually left. When he was getting ready to leave I gave him a huge hug and told him that if he didn't want to go he can stay home.....we could double up on the Algebra instead for the two weeks. With an offer like that, can you believe he still went : )

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